MY TESTIMONY

By Martin Larranaga Jr

Ten years ago today, I shot my father.  My name is Martin Larranaga Jr.  I have been in prison for ten years.  I am 45 years old.

Doing time is not something new to me.  The first time, I was in a juvenile hall.  I was 13 years old.  I would spend a lot of my young life and ironically even now in some ways trying to be like my father. He was incarcerated most of my life but the moments I spent with him as a young boy, I would soak up like the sun.  The weights in prison made hm bigger than the average man and his time in the marines gave him a discipline that inspired those around him.  I worshipped the man.

After some time in the juvenile hall, I hit C.Y.A. That place made me ten times more than I came in.  My first prison term was earned by stabbing in the face two out of the three men who jumped me.  I was following my father’s footsteps to the “T”.  After that prison term, I got deep into the things of God.  I felt the pull of the Holy Spirit toward God and a hunger for His Word.  After a failed marriage, murder of a friend, and the loss of my job, I lost faith and fell back to my old habits with my homeboys and alcohol.  I was going down fast, but before I hit the ground, I met a woman who loved me and helped stabilize my reckless behavior.  We got married.

Alcohol would dominate my life and put a strain on our relationship. I was taking the good in my life for granted. To make a long story short, we agreed to divorce, and I left the house.  Then I found out my father and my wife were having an affair.  The dual defrayal coupled with alcohol fueled an anger and hurt that would lead me to shoot my father.  I was sentenced to 30 years in prison for attempted murder.  Did it feel good when I did it.  Yes, it did.  But that moment of satisfaction cannot compare to the pain of prison.  The regrets of leaving my four children fatherless, my mother the presence of her son and of course, the damaged relationship with my father.

However, through this time of imprisonment, my Redeemer Jesus Christ has changed my cold heart.  Today, I honor my relationship with Jesus above all else which in turn allows me to have healthy relationships with others.  The cross of Christ has broken the grip that Satan had on me.  All this time, I worshipped the wrong man.  I still love my father, but I worship Jesus Christ.